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NO PROOF IT WORKS: Men worried about their size rush to concoctions for enlargement

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The big myth out there when it comes to matters of the bedroom is that the bigger it is, the better it will be. Top urologists and sex therapists have several times poured scorn on this popular belief, but most men would still be worried about their size whenever they are about to hit it out with a new woman.

This worry among men is the one that has even driven some to going for various forms of penile enlargement. It does not matter if it is pills, roadside concoctions, oils, specialized lotions, surgeries or a dose of the famous moporota tree, men would try anything to add some length and width to their penis.

In Botswana, it is common to hear people talk glowingly about the powers of moporota, also known as the ‘sausage fruit’ from what is commonly called the ‘sausage tree.’ The tree is scientifically classified among the genus kigelia Africana family and is only found in Africa. Many Batswana men buy it in the form of powder, sold on the streets, with the aim of increasing their sizes and thereby earn respect from the women they sleep with.

Yet research shows that the size of a man’s penis has less bearing on sexual satisfaction than factors like open communication, emotional intimacy, and understanding your partner’s sexual needs and desires. In fact, there is proven potential harm that many enlargement treatments can cause to one’s sexual, mental, and physical health.

Again, many of these enlargement interventions rarely deliver the desired results, leaving the men even more frustrated. If anything, the concoctions can even be harmful to the penis in the long run, according to urologists. Botswana’s Clinical Sexologist Lesedi Bokhutlo is of the view that men’s insecurities on their sexual performance play a major role in their lack of confidence in their God-given sizes.

This is because a man is wired to think that good sex is when a woman really feels the penis inside hit hard on all corners of her insides, and seeing the woman clutch at things while screaming in pleasure. Anything to the contrary tells the man that something is wrong with him, and that is why he then seeks to add a few layers and centimeters to his manhood. It gets worse, the clinical sexologist says, if the insecure man sees the larger size of another man at some urinary, or even on porn movies.

Speaking to a local newspaper recently, Bokhutlo shared that a 2021 study showed that about 55 per cent of men  involved in the study, especially the middle-aged group, do consider penile enlargement. Bokhutlo says the men are misguided as even a penis that is considered small has the ability to yield different types of orgasms, which is all that women need.  “Practice the right way of orgasm-yielding sex as orgasm is what most women long for,” he said.

A 2023 study published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior found that low sexual desire in women could be traced back to unequal division of chores around the house. According to the study, women who felt that the chores at home were unfairly divided felt that their partners were dependent on them, which reduced sexual desire.

Understand that sex should feel like play, not work. “Men may be motivated to be sexually compliant due to motivations related to altruism, intoxication, sexual inexperience, peer pressure, popularity, and sex-role concerns,” explains psychologist Cory Pederson, who co-authored a 2022 study published in Psychology and Sexuality that explored how stereotypical gender roles can cause heterosexual men to engage in consensual, yet undesired sexual activity. Changing your mindset to be more mindful of pleasure can reduce the pressure to perform sexually or satisfy your partner, which is an effective tactic to switch the focus from your size to your enjoyment in the bedroom.

It is therefore not necessary for men to be running for concoctions such as moporota or other offerings from roadside traditional medicine men. One just has to set the right tone at home, and learn how to please their women with whatever firepower they have. Many women have even complained that they do not really enjoy sex with men who are thick and long as many such hurt rather than please them. Perhaps then, moporota and related concoctions may just be overrated and a waste of money.

In fact, despite various manufacturers having claimed that products, including pills, creams, concoctions and stretching devices can increase penis size, scientific research has found no evidence that these things work. Some people also consider surgery.

The Urology Care Foundation points out that none of these work, with some men actually considering surgery. A 2020 review found very little evidence to support penis enlargement in men with a small penis but no other health problems. The participants had all undergone treatment. However, most came to realize that their penis was a “normal” size. Most did not seek further treatment. Surgery may help a person with a condition known as micropenis. However, it can be risky and is not certain to improve sexual satisfaction.

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